Saturday, November 23, 2013

Is This My Monthly Post?

I feel like this is me most of the time. 
My head just turns in circles after work and my short drive home sometimes isn't long enough to get out of adjuster mode and into home life mode. 
I absolute love my promotion at work. 
I love my new position.
I love my new team.
But it is alot of work. 
Some days are not bad at all....
and other days....
I pray for sanity to make it through each hour!
Then you get the funny the 65+ year old man who didn't have money to maintain auto insurance BUT let me know how lonely he's been for the past nine years and he sure will make a trip down here to see me because I sound like a nice woman....
....ummm... No Thank You!

So while I wish most days were like this..... 
they just aren't!

So what have we been up to? The last couple of weeks of October were very pleasant. The first few weeks of November as well. 
We took our boys out to get fresh air.
I will post a couple of pictures of my precious Charlie..... 
and Micah...who rarely goes out. He never wants to come back in! 
And he's scared of the wind and cars and loud sounds....
He probably still has flash backs of being abandoned in the dog park! 
I'm not posting much on Charlie because honestly, my heart just cannot handle it.
He passed away October 21, 2013.
My heart is still broken. I still ache for my baby boy. It hasn't stopped hurting and I still can't stop crying.
He was my love, my baby, my prince, my snuggle buddy, my heart, my son I never had.
Nights are still hard with out him. 
What else have we been doing?
CC has obviously been taking "selfies".
Lena's been catching up on Grim and Once Upon A Time.
I am enjoying my last few weeks of college football.
And yes, this IS my mantra!
I am pretty sure we watched Johnny Manziel's last game on Kyle Field. 
While I would LOVE nothing more than for him to return one more year, I really don't see that happening.
He is amazing!
He is a talent like we have never seen.
He plays with his heart...I hope that continues as he begins his NFL career!
And of course I have been scouting Aggie gear for the colder weather...
(like what blew in last night!)

Lena's been enjoying watching her Zach Mettenberger, the quarterback for the LSU Tigers.
They meet with A&M today
We are truly a house divided! 
And I even threw in a little NFL watching for good measure. 
I watch ONE Dallas Cowboy game and I end up with a double spider bite on my stomach. 
See....good things just don't happen when you watch the Cowboys play!
November 1 brought back Starbucks red cups!!!
I have certainly had a fair share!!
And the girls and I stocked up on supplies for home made Caramel Apple Cider
I made my first batch of Praline Apple Bread this year.
I've really been slacking in the baking department.
This has been a rough year.
The lack of posts, pictures and activities have certainly proved it! 
We girls have also been trying to get in nightly walks. 
There is nothing like ending a crazy, hectic day with a evening walk, breathing in fresh air and being silly with my girls. 
We make some of the best memories on our walks.
I also found this from when we went to Milberger's Autumn/Fall set up. She was spooky, off in a corner. 
I like her! 
I have made the switch from an iPhone to an Android. I'm getting used to it. Never thought I'd be an Android person. It's not SO bad I guess....if I could just learn how to use the darn thing!
My neck/back problem has not improved. Even after the cervical ablation. I did find some relief initially, aside from the fact that the area gets hot and feels burned, even to this day. My thumb twitches uncontrollably. I tried to buy groceries a couple of weeks ago...just simple things like cilantro, spinach, trout fillets, greens onions...little things like that. 
Just putting the items on the conveyor belt made the neck/shoulder area even worse. I drove home in tears and have been on muscle relaxers ever since. 
I cannot get a good nights sleep because I always hurt. There HAS to be some resolution to this.
People just can't live in pain like this all the time, can they?
I am so tired...tired of being tired, tired of hurting, tired of not being able to do things I used to be able to do, tired of telling my girls I can't do this or do that, or I don't feel like doing or going somewhere because I'm hurting again. These are the last months/years that they are going to still want to do things with me and I'm missing out on all of it. I hate that. You can NEVER get that time back.
I hate that this injury happened. 
I hate that I'm not me. 
My poor husband...I'm not even going there with what all he has had to put up with and without.
I just keep pushing forward...trying to make the best out of what I can do
and just keep praying they'll find some way to help me.